Staying Positive Amidst Uncertainty by: Amanda Vander Kelen

Staying positive during uncertainty is probably when it is most important, and yet most difficult. What I have discovered about myself in this process, and what I hope could be helpful for at least one person reading this, is that it is not a linear process. Sometimes, in order to achieve the positive space, you have to create it. Sometimes, you have to fake it till you make it, and force it upon yourself. That may sound uncomfortable, and if so, you are correct. What do I mean by this? You might be thinking that being positive means feeling happy all the time. That isn't true. It can't be true. As all animals, we have a gamut of emotions and experiences. Those happen to exist alongside whatever is happening in our lives at any given moment. Oftentimes, when those experiences are too much for any one person, it becomes a "trauma" and, however great that trauma is in relation to our being means that it could coexist in our lives until we figure out the right healthy combination to ease the suffering. 

Now, that being said, how do you "create" this positive space? How does one "fake it till you make it"? For me, this looks like not giving up at the end of the day. I myself may go through feelings of hopelessness that nothing will actually pan out anymore. After pushing and striving for so much for so long, sometimes the steam runs out for "feeling" positive when there hasn't been anything concrete to back it up for a while. When I start to think critically about this, it makes sense. If the effort that goes into "feeling" positive is not rewarded in the way that we need, then there is a disconnect. This, then, makes sense that it would become increasingly more difficult to remain in a state of "feeling" positive. I would suggest allowing yourself the space to feel the emotions that come up, such as disappointment, for example. You may vacillate between a few different uncomfortable emotions for a bit. That's ok. At the end of the day, even if you are still feeling "down" about things, what is important is that you still say, "everything is going to work out for me." Even if you don't believe it in that moment. You may have believed it 100% just yesterday, and today, maybe you believe it only 1%, or less. But, you still say it. Even if you don't believe it in that moment. That is what I mean by, "fake it till you make it". As long as you continue to "think" it, you will have a much easier time getting back to "feeling" it again. Then, when things start to fall into place, and they will (how could they not, after how hard you have been working to make things "work"?), it will feel calm and exactly right. 

Basically, it is by training ourselves to continue to keep on target (staying positive) that we can remain in this positive state of being. 

Ok, so now that I have sort of explained what this is, what is this not? This is not the fluffy platitude positivity that is strewn about social media memes and the like. It is also not the condescending or patronizing "you should smile" positivity that is too often engendered upon women. This is literally just training your brain to not lose hope during a difficult moment, day, week, etc. 

I am curious how you find staying positive when the feeling is wavering. Do you "fake it till you make it"?  If you haven't done this yet, I invite you to give it a go. If you do happen to give it a try, I'd love to hear how this worked for you. Let me know in the comments below!

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Thank you for taking the time to read my words. 

Mindfully,
~Amanda

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Amanda Vander Kelen, MA is a geographer/GIS Specialist and now blogger. She creates a work/life balance by using her creativity in both making maps and writing blogs. Taking a mindful approach to life, she hopes you can utilize her writing to help create a peaceful space of your own.
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